Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Christmas Greetings: "I Wish You A Merry and Rational Christmas!"


I read somewhere that Christmas is one particular time of the year that people get very stressed and depressed.  It is because Christmas brings with it all sorts of beliefs and traditions that tell you that you SHOULD be happily spending time with ALL the people you love and who love you back -- in other words it is the time for perfect and complete reunions.  Also, Christmas is SUPPOSED TO BE a time for buying gifts and new stuff and special food, in other words it's a time when you are supposed to have LOTS of things.  Consequently, if your loved ones are abroad or somewhere far, or if you yourself are the one abroad, your sense of lonesomeness and corresponding grief are heightened -- even if being abroad actually means that you have been blessed with a means of livelihood and the ability to provide for your family back home.  And if you also happen to not have the spare cash to spend on the very many extra expenses that Christmas requires, you end up feeling so deprived and poor -- even if you actually have enough money to meet all your regular needs.  Feeling lonely and thinking that you are poor can escalate to feeling ashamed and thinking that you are a failure.  Thus, depression ensues.   But it’s all really in the mind.  Hence, if I may, let me share my own experience and coping mechanism regarding this.

Most people believe that Friday evenings are meant to be spent to go out and have fun, as a way of enjoying some well-deserved leisure after a whole week's worth of work.  I used to think that way as well, especially when I was still in my early twenties, and therefore I would end up feeling depressed whenever I watched my colleagues  leave the office on a Friday evening to go have some fun, while I stayed behind because I decided to do some more work.  It was awful.  But then I stumbled on a very helpful technique.  The technique is this - If Friday arrives and you find yourself unable to participate in everyone else's fun and nightlife because you still have to work or do something else, then all you have to do is think and pretend that it is Wednesday, and instantly your frustration will disappear.  Try it, it works.

The same thing applies with Christmas, if you keep telling yourself that Christmas is that time of the year that you should be surrounded by loved ones and have lots of everything, then you are really setting yourself up for the risk of stress, frustration, disappointment, and depression.  On the other hand, if you tell yourself that Christmas is the day that our Lord Jesus was born, and that just like Easter (the day that He resurrected) you don’t really have to do anything special apart from praying and/or attending Christmas Mass (just like Easter Mass), then there is a good chance that you will not be depressed, and will instead be quite happy.  It also greatly helps if you sit down and contemplate on (probably even make an actual list of) all the blessings you really needed and received -- and all the prayers that you said and were answered -- in the past year.  Contemplate as well on the many more blessings that -- you know in your heart -- God will still give you in the coming year.   Try it, it works, guaranteed!   That is how I coped during a couple of years that I happened to be abroad (because of work) and could not come home to the Philippines during Christmas time to be with my family.  It’s really all in the mind.

After all, the gifts of the Holy Spirit include "wisdom" (Isiah 11:2, and 1 Corinthians 12).  Thus, to be spiritual is to be rational.

On that note, let me greet you a very Merry Christmas!  And I pray that you be happy, with or without all the gifts, parties and reunions.  Cheers!


Monday, December 2, 2013

Diplomacy and Statesmanship



According to news, “President Aquino is not bothered by a report that China is deploying an aircraft carrier to the South China Sea.”  Please see http://www.abs-cbnnews.com/nation/11/28/13/pnoy-not-bothered-chinese-aircraft-carrier.

This is one issue where I agree with and support PNoy, and where I believe he is exhibiting commendable statesmanship. It is best to be prudent and diplomatic, because once we start a war of words with another country, particularly with a superpower like China, then it is difficult to backtrack and recover.


On a related note, it seems that China is also getting on the nerves of other superpowers like Japan. For me this is “good news,” because it just goes to show that China is not picking on us and singling us out just because our country is smaller and relatively poorer. Apparently, China (or at least its government, not necessarily its people) is behaving like a bully towards everyone, regardless of the stature and power of these other countries. For instance, Japan may be smaller in terms of population and land area, but in terms of defense technology and firepower, well …